Slynnro

Monday, June 27, 2011

Scenes From My Elevator: You're Really Wearing Those Ed.

I'm gonna just change this blog to be called Scenes From, because damn, people are interesting!  I've made it my personal goal to just start chatting up peeps wherever I go, because let me tell you, it's a real treat!  I inherited this gene from my father, who has never gone anywhere in his life without making a friend.  Much to my mother's chagrin, my dad talks to anyone and everyone, which can tend to make small expeditions into lengthy ones.  But turns out, pops was on to something.  Everyone has got something to share, man!

Which takes me to today, when I briefly went home for lunch to acquire meds for my constantly ailing tum.  

Scene:  Slynnro gets on elevator, which is already occupied by incredibly tall, be-dread-headed man in athletic shorts and hipster spectacles.

Dude:  Hello! (people on my elevator are always so damn nice!  It's an elevator miracle!)

Me:  (staring at buttons on elevator) I can never remember where I freakin' parked!

Dude:  Yeah, I know, it's all just part of their game.

Me:  (who the fuck is they?)

Dude:  (smile)

Me:  Wait a minute, do your frames really not have lenses in them?

Dude:  Nope.  No lenses.

Me:  (wow, this guy is seriously wearing glasses with NO DAMN LENSES!)

Me:  Man, I gotta tell ya.  That's really weird.


Dude:  Aw, naw.  I picked them up when I was in the Carib. (knowingly)

Me:  (Oh, so you are so familiar with the Caribbean that it's the "Carib" to you?)    (Also, not sure how that makes this make ANY DAMN SENSE.)

Me:  Ah, well, yes obviously.

Dude:  I get bored a lot.

Me:  (elevator reaches my floor)  Have a nice day!  Good luck with seeing and all!





Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Scenes From a Weekend: Cabbie Ed.

On Saturday, I attended a pub crawl to celebrate a friend's birthday.  Nothing of consequence, but I was 1) the only girl and 2) I believe the only heterosexual in attendance.  To say I had a fun time was an understatement, However, it started around 2 pm, so by 10:30, I was BEYOND DONE.  Which is how I found myself sitting on a curb alone outside of a bar, waiting on a cab.

From the moment the cab came screeching around the corner, I knew I was in for quite a ride.  This thought was confirmed when I stepped into the cab and greeted by the sounds of DMX blasting from the speakers.

Cabbie:  Hello!  Welcome to my cab!

(I've never felt so welcome in someone else's car before)

Me:  Um.  Hello.

Cabbie:  You are Sarah, yes?

Me:  (no, that's not my name)  Yes.

Cabbie:  Do you do yoga Sarah?

Me:  Um, no.  I'm more about strength training and whatnot.  Gotta protect myself.

Cabbie:  Yes, Sarah.  You look like you are all about kicking some ass.

Me:  Obviously.

Cabbie:  I PLAY DMX FOR YOU NOW!

Me:  Indeed.


And thus, the cab driver and I began out duet to Lose My Mind.

And thus also began the cab driver head banging while driving.


WHEEEE!


But, he wasn't done.

Cabbie:  YOU ARE VERY FUN SARAH!

Me:  So are you!

Cabbie:  Where is your car?

Me:  Over by the Red Mango on McKinney.

Cabbie:  I do not know where that is.  People don't normally take cabs to yogurt Sarah!

Me:  Touche.

And so we find my car.

Cabbie:  You wait, Sarah.  I show you my kickboxing moves.  Do you kickbox?

Me:  OF FUCKING COURSE!

Cabbie:  (begins a minute long demonstration of kickboxing moves.  Kindly, he turned the meter off.)

Me:  That was IMPRESSIVE!

Cabbie:  Thank you.  I give you my card.  I am your cab driver.  From now on.

Me:  Sounds cool to me.

Cabbie:  You always call me.  Next time, I show you my African dancing.  And then, I show you how we defend ourselves in war.

Me:  It's an urban jungle out there, to be sure.

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Go. Buy. This. J. Crew Linen Sweater Ed.

I picked up this top in white today at J. Crew, and now I see it online and am obviously desirous of ALL OF THE COLORS!  It's the perfect weight to layer with a tank or camisole and it's incredibly flattering.  J. Crew is (kinda?  Sorta?  Maybe?) back in my heart!


Fits generously (I got a size small, but I also fit in the XS, but wanted it looser.)

Sunday, June 05, 2011

Current Obsessions.

Adele.



Unoriginal.  Don't Care.

This Dress.  My current style motto?  What would Joan Holloway do?




Green Eye Make Up, Specifically, Chanel Eye Shadow Quad in Lilium and Clinique Color Surge in Spruce Up.






Breaking Bad and my crush on Aaron Paul.  He's such a presh little meth dealer.


So he ain't Don Draper.  They can't all be.

Short Damn Shorts.  I hemmed and hawed over these for a good hour in the bathroom.  And then I realized 30 ain't old.


Whatever.  I have better legs at 30 than I did at 18.  THANK YOU PURE BARRE.